Why is it that people, men and women, go to the trouble of setting up a dating profile, then spend hours reading profiles, emailing potential prospects for a date, then the hours chatting online or on the phòne to do one or more of the following:
1. Show for just the free meal or drink 2, Not show at all, even after confirming as close 15 minutes out from meeting time. 3. Not look like their pictures 4. Be someone totally different than any other interaction. 5. And the list goes on.............
Some can actually show up, carry on with their mask then weeks later have it come off and be someone totally different. So what's it all about? Could it be a way to make themselves feel better about who they are? You know like, "I'll show up and this guy or girl will want to spend time, money or both on me". To somehow increase their own self worth. I guess that's the thing that gets me the most. So many individuals in society look to others to validate who they are. So now we use dating sites to do it with that many more people. My theory for the "no shows" is that they have created a dating profile of who they want to be, or sometimes who they really think they are. Then when it gets right down to the brass tacks of it all, they are screaming "oh shit!, I have to show up and be that person for more than a 5 minute email". Yep, better bail! Then there is the group that posts their age (or somewhere close) and pictures of when they were 20's or 30's. i just have one question-"WTF were you thinking?" You either just wanted a pen pal or you're an idiot. Dating site would indicate that at some point you will meet in person to go on, what's it called again? Oh yes a DATE! Then the ones that act different online or on the phone then they do in person. I can give a little on this one for temporary, with people just being nervous and stuff......but when it goes on for a few weeks its all been a waste of time. Speaks to people having a hard time being themselves with other people, especially someone that they want to have an intimate relationship with.
Just one of my personal experiences: I meet a woman on a dating site. We emailed through the app a few times and it was interesting. Then we met for breakfast one day and it was a good relaxing time. I paid of course and we had some dates, and she would invite me to dinner at her house. Now it all started kind of subtlely, she was doing some home improvements while we were seeing each other. I was truly glad to help with the things that I had skills for and she wasn't shy about asking either. If she was doing a task that I could have helped with but was necessarily my forte, then she really didn't seem to want me around. If she needed a ride somewhere or wanted to go out though I was the guy she called....lol. I had moved some satellite cables for one of her projects. Soon after, she said she couldn't see me anymore. She accused me of lying to her about drinking and getting drunk when we weren't together. Which i thought was absurd because I drink very little and not very often because of health issues. Nonetheless we stopped seeing each other and I was completely okay with that since we had only seen each other part time for about 5 weeks and most of that was me working on her house for her or hauling her around town. So fast forward a couple of months later........I was out of town visiting some friends and I get 2 missed calls from this gal, then a text message asking about the cables that I moved for her. I gave her the information she asked for and figured that was the end of the conversation. It went on though. She asked "will I need special tools to move it again?" I started laughing like you can't believe. You see after the accusations that she threw at me to not see me anymore, she needed my expertise again and was waiting for me to offer. Instead I politely told her in another text message "Probably, be safe and take care". I never heard from her again. If you listen to someone long enough they will tell you who they are.
I guess i will leave you with this final thought, "Dating after 40 is like going to the dump and picking out the least broken piece of refuse"
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